Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Change is Good

It’s amazing how one small change can make a big difference.

It’s not like this is a new concept for me—in fact I’ve known it for several years. I’m a huge advocate of change and adapting as necessary in order to improve, evolve, or grow. In my role at Cummins prior to my leave, driving change was basically my job.

Yet, in my personal life it’s been easy to forget.

Now that I work out of the home, this is how I dress pretty much every day.

What you have here are your basic comfy pants in black (gray or purple on the odd occasion), a loose shirt, and a long sweater. In the winter it’s a long sleeve sweater (gray), and in the summer the pants are the same but shorter (and sometimes a shorter sweater). Even when I worked at Cummins it was the same look, but amped up for work—the pants were still comfy (and black) but they were dress slacks, and I wore a black jacket in place of the sweater.

I started layering when my hormonal problems began, and I experienced severe temperature swings. However, when the hot/cold flashes stopped the sweaters remained. I no longer wore them for warmth, but to hide. I didn’t like my arms showing and felt better when my back side was covered up. Occasionally I’d change up the bottom half and wear a pair of jeans, as long as I knew I wouldn’t have to be in them for long. They weren’t comfortable, and I always had a ‘muffin top’ that I had to add another layer to control.

So I defaulted to comfort. Comfort in the loose fitting clothes, and comfort in knowing that the areas of my body I didn’t like were covered up.

As I was getting dressed today, I grabbed a pair of those go-to pants automatically. However I paused before putting them on. I’ve claimed that I’ve learned to love myself for who I am, so why can’t I wear clothes that don’t cover everything up?

I put those pants back and put this on instead.

Today I have to go grocery shopping, run my daughter to gymnastics, to the orthodontist, and then back to gymnastics. Then I’m home getting work done (either on the computer or around the house). I would have never considered wearing jeans on a day like today. Its the kind of day where comfort is very appealing.

But you know what? I feel so different today in my ‘non-standard’ outfit. I feel like I’m making changes. I feel lighter without all those layers to hide behind. It makes me want to keep working hard for more progress.

Change feels good. No more hiding.

(You might still see the sweater from time to time—I do live in Indiana after all where the weather changes in the snap of a finger!)

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