Getting Back to the Basics

On January 10th, a new 10 week session started at FXB here in Columbus. I was excited for this new round of newbies for various reasons:

•  I would no longer be the lowest person on the bag shaped totem pole
• Some friends are in this 10 week session and I’m SUPER excited to see the progress they’ll make
•  I wanted to see what it was like to go back and do a Week 1 workout all over again

Two weeks have now passed, and I’ve learned some valuable lessons from this new 10 week session.

I actually know what I’m doing.

It sure is strange to be one of the people in the gym who knows what to do. And more than that, to be one of the FIT members helping the 10 weekers with their form.

What??

I mean, there are still days when I feel like I need to be corrected on my form. I was talking to The Ninja about this last week, and she reminded me that we will always have something to improve—no matter how long we’ve been a FIT member.

Now I just need to do better at stepping up and helping those newbies. There have been a few times in the workouts when I notice that one of the 10 weekers around me doesn’t quite have the correct form. I debate over and over if I should step up to help, and in that time a coach or instructor notices and beats me to the punch.

It always feels great to pay it forward, so I need to remain confident in the fact that I do know what I’m doing and that I can help those 10 weekers.

The basics will always be tough.

As the new 10 week session approached, I was eagerly anticipating Week 1. I wanted to see how it felt this time around compared to my first week. I had visions of pushing through the workouts like I just got my runner’s high. After the brutal week right before the new 10 weeks started—the one where all the instructors competed to see who could most effectively kill us—I figured Week 1 would be difficult, but that I’d make it through much easier this time around. I’d be breathing easier. I wouldn’t feel like collapsing on the mat after the workout.

Well, yet again FXB has given me a hook-cross-switch foot roundhouse right back to reality.

The pace may be slower, the exercises might be basic, but they are still tough. Of course my analytical brain had to sort this out. I know I’m stronger. I know my endurance is better. So why is it just as hard? Why do I face plant into my puddles of Liquid Awesome at the end of each workout? Why am I waking up in the night with my shoulders aching?

My conclusion is that going back to the basics has forced me to challenge myself in new ways.

•  I want to set a good example for my 10 week partner, so I push myself faster/harder.
•  I hit the bag harder and faster.
• I try to kick the bag harder and higher.
• I’m actually doing all the burpees the FIT members have to still do between combinations.
• I’m trying to do as many of my push-ups from my toes as possible.
• I up my bands because I know we’re just doing classic sets, and I should be able to last through the entire set with that next color up.

I have a new appreciation for the start of a 10 week session. Going forward, I now know that I need to use this time to refocus on the basics, and set new challenges for myself.

No matter what kind of exercise program you are involved in, every once in a while take it back to the beginning. Focus on the basics—your form, your pace, your intensity—and see how you can up your game in new ways. Teach someone else. Keep evolving and challenging yourself!

And remember:

Meet my FXB Instructors: The Ninja

The Ninja: a.k.a. Brittany

OK, first I have to say that the top definition for ninja on Urbandictionary.com is really funny. If you dare, go check it out—just don’t drink your water while reading it. 


Why do I dub Brittany The Ninja? I’ve pulled a few of the 'facts' from the Urban Dictionary definition to prove my point:

Ninja don't sweat.

It's called “Liquid Awesome”, people.

Ninja never wear headbands with the word "ninja" printed on them.

All of Brittany’s headbands say, “Farrell’s”

Ninja don't play sports. Unless killing is a sport.

Brittany has killed my legs and arms on more than one occasion!

Can remove a spleen in one swift motion

I mean seriously, have you seen her roundhouse?

There are several other ‘facts’ in the definition that I’m sure Brittany will use to argue that she is not a ninja, but that’s fine. I maintain my position that she represents a new generation of ninjas—one where ninjas do, in fact, wear Spandex.

However there is one main reason why Brittany is The Ninja:

You don’t see her coming.

Maybe it’s the juxtaposition of her cheery voice with her killer workouts. When you see her smile and hear the laughter in her voice, you might think, “She’s so nice, I’m sure she’s going to go easy on us.”

Well, you’d be wrong. One word:

N-I-N-J-A

A diet starts on Monday, but a new life starts the moment it’s ready.

I’ve been around the diet block a long time, and I’ve noticed something alarming.

Why does a diet always start on Monday? Or at the New Year? Or next week? Or after the holidays? It’s like there’s something engrained within us that restricts us from starting at 2:27 p.m. on a Wednesday.

Let me pause and talk about child birth for a moment. Even if you’ve never been pregnant, I’m certain that you have known someone who has been. If not, then I’m sure you watch TV, movies, or read. The point is, you should be able to agree that a baby doesn’t wait for a Monday, or the New Year, or the first of the month, or after the holidays. The baby doesn’t care what plans you may or may not have. Labor begins when it begins.

Some babies come close to when they’re expected, or a little late. When this happens, the parents are usually well prepared. The nursery is painted and all decked out in cotton candy colors. The house has been cleaned and organized, and cleaned and organized again. And possibly even cleaned and organized a third time. (It’s called nesting, and it’s real.) The hospital bags have been packed. When the baby actually arrives, the foundation is solidly in place. Even first time parents are able to start off strong on their own—even if they need to use their ‘phone a friend’ card a few times. There might even be some frantic calls to the doctor, but they are able to navigate their way through the unknown territory.

However some babies come early. When this happens, not only are the parents unprepared, but there could be complications for the baby. The baby might have to fight to grow.  The baby will need a lot of support. An extended hospital stay might be required. The baby might not hit milestones at the same rate as other babies born at the same time who were not pre-mature.

So what’s all this baby stuff got to do with dieting? Nothing.

That’s because dieting was probably the stupidest thing ever invented.

For one, diets don’t last. I can give you countless examples of people who have lost weight on a diet and then gained everything back. Why? Not because that person is a failure, but because diets are stupid.

Second, a diet can make a person feel horrible about themselves. Sure, once they start losing weight they feel good. But it’s not easy getting there. There’s the comments and policing from others—for example a dieter often hears, “Should you be eating that on your diet?” There’s also the disappointment you feel when you ‘fall off the wagon’ or gain everything back once you reach your goal.

A diet is not meant to be sustainable, but a new life is.

If you are one of the many, many people out there who have made a New Year’s Resolution to lose weight, then I encourage you to look at it with the right frame of mind.

You are starting a new life, and you need to give it the attention it needs.

It’s possible you’ve been working toward this for a while and you’re well prepared. You’re that new parent with all the books and articles and a schedule to boot. If you’re in this camp, just remember that you can’t become complacent. A new life is constantly evolving and maturing and requires different levels of nurturing and support throughout its life cycle. Don’t allow your new life to go into cardiac arrest—keep taking the pulse and adjust as necessary.

However, if you induced labor at the start of the New Year, then it’s possible your new life is like that baby born too early. Maybe you’ve wanted to get healthy for a long time but haven’t felt ready, yet you were pushed into starting something because it’s the New Year. If this is you, then your new life will need lots of support and attention to make it grow strong. It will take extra effort, and you might need to lean on others for help.

I induced labor on my new life back on September 13, 2014. In many ways I was ready, but in many others I was not. Luckily, I found the right environment at FXB to let my new life thrive.

I hope you find what works for you, so you can enjoy a sustaining and amazing new life.

Top 10: Things I hear at the gym

Originally posted on December 30, 2014 on carriebeckort.com

Ah, the end of the year. I still can’t believe a new year is just two days away, but I’ll go with it. This time of year is marked by Cold Duck, cheap noise makers, karaoke in hotel rooms, and countdowns. There will be no karaoke in a hotel room for me this year, but I’m sure that my New Year’s Eve will encompass the rest... well, maybe not the Cold Duck since I signed up for the New Year’s Day resistance training! In the spirit of the New Year, I decided to give you my own countdown of the top 10 things I enjoy hearing while working out at FXB.

10. The grunts and groans.

Yep, I love to hear my fellow gym members grunt it out. A groan makes it even better. These sounds tell me that I’m not alone in my misery.

9. The laughter.

This tells me that no matter how much we may need to grunt and groan, we are all there because we want to be there. It’s a place to get serious and work on improving health, but it’s also a place to have fun.

8. Ice Ice Baby.

Come on, admit it. You’re a closet Ice Ice Baby lover too. I see those toes tapping when it comes on over the speakers.

7. “Level” ... “10”

I consider this the FXB version of a concert shout-out. The instructor yells, “Level” and we all call back, “10”. Although, I’ve always wondered... if we were all at a true Level 10, wouldn’t we be too out of breath to be able to call it out? (wink)

6. “Are you with me?” ... “Woo!”

I consider this the FXB version of an ‘Amen’ shout-out you might hear in an energetic church. And if we’re not energetic enough, the instructor lets us know and we try again. Similar comments to #7 though... I know my “Woos” always come out more as a deep sigh.

5. “Challenge yourself—band it up!”

This little encouragement usually does the trick for me. I’ll make it through the first slow count and the fast count and think, “I’ll just stick with red.” But then the instructor calls out this innocent line and the guilt kicks in. So I grab the blue.

4. “Pop.”

This sound usually happens after complying with #5. It’s the wonderful sound that comes with the only version of the F-bomb I still allow in my vocabulary—muscle failure. It also means that the band hit the mat rather than my foot when I dropped it!

3. Synchronized Round House Kicks

This really is pretty cool. The whole gym, kicking together to the instructor’s count. BAM!

2. “Great job.”

I’ve said this before, and I’ll say it again. The people at FXB are amazing. There are so many encouraging comments flying around the entire time—from “great job” to “you’ve got this”. Everyone is there to support everyone else and it’s simply awesome.

1. “...3, 2, 2, 1”

Yep, this is the number one thing I love to hear at the gym. It means my 45 minutes (or 75 if it’s a FIT Kick) are over, and that I made it another day!

I hope everyone has a fun, and safe, New Year’s Eve! And don’t forget to sing Ice Ice Baby at the top of your lungs while kickin’ back some Cold Duck!

I’m dropping an F-bomb

Originally posted on December 20, 2014 on carriebeckort.com

I’m going to warn you now—I’m dropping an F-bomb in this post. However, it’s not the F-bomb you are probably thinking of. I’m talking about an F-bomb that is more offensive than the mother of all cuss words.

Failure

Yep, that’s right. I’m dropping it and letting it go from my vocabulary world. This F-bomb will no longer have a place in my arsenal of weapons in my war on an unhealthy lifestyle.

The other thing I’m going to tell you right up front is that this is probably going to be the most difficult post for me to publish. I didn’t want to do it. I wanted to keep doing what I’m good at—hiding. I wanted to keep showing a different face to all those who don’t know that there’s a real me lurking somewhere just below the surface. But then I started thinking about all the messages, emails, and comments I’ve received from several of you telling me how much I’ve inspired you. I realized that it was my honesty that inspired you the most. Because of that, I want to be honest with you now. I want to give you what you ask for, because you have all encouraged me and supported me through this journey. And I also need to do this for myself.

You might remember my post from a while back about how I got to this point. I mentioned that my primary obstacles were my hormone problems, my dysfunctional thyroid, and my emotional inability to love myself. In that post I also mentioned that I make poor eating choices, but I didn’t elaborate. I’ve dropped (not so) subtle hints in a few (most) of my posts that I like chocolate. Well, I figured it’s time to let my monster out.

So, here we go.

Hello, my name is Carrie and I’m a closet binge eater.

It’s been so easy for me to constantly blame my weight only on the three primary obstacles mentioned above. Don’t get me wrong—these are significant, and they are what got me to this point. However, I don’t like to give my binge eating any credit. I don’t want to admit to it. It’s the reason I do it in private after all. It’s a secret that I don’t want anyone to know about. I’ve convinced myself that if people knew, they’d judge me—and maybe you are right now. But along with my new found love of myself, I’ve also learned to accept that some people will judge. Maybe becoming an author has helped me better accept the judgment of others. Regardless, I don’t hate you for it.

So what’s a closet binge eater you might ask? Let’s take my favorite food item—chocolate. When I say I want to eat chocolate, I’m not talking about a Snickers bar from the check-out line. I’m talking about the party size bag of M&Ms. When I want ice cream, it’s not a cone from the DQ. It’s a pint of something with chocolate chips. Potato chips? I can take down a whole bag—but only if they are the Ruffles Sour Cream and Onion. See, that’s one of the funny things about binge eating (at least for me). It’s very specific. I can go into a store looking for those Ruffles Sour Cream and Onion chips and if they don’t have them, I’ll walk out with nothing. I don’t eat just any chips, it has to be specific. Unfortunately, there have been days when I’ve eaten all of the above in one day. I may not eat anything else in that day, but it’s enough to do some damage.

Even though I wouldn’t eat like this every day, it was enough to keep me from making any progress on my weight loss. More importantly, it made me feel like crap. Not just physically, but emotionally. Because after I always felt guilty. I felt ashamed. I felt like I was deceiving everyone.

I felt like a failure.

I don’t know when this started, and I certainly don’t know why it started. I do know that my two primary trigger points at this stage in my life are:

1) when my husband travels

2) when I’m really stressed out

During the 10 week program at FXB, I didn’t binge at all. I did eat chocolate on Fun Day (and it was somewhere between the check-out line sized candy bar and the party sized bags), but it was controlled. I was actually able to leave some chocolate in the bag and save it for the next Fun Day.

I was thrilled. I felt great. I didn’t feel like I was deceiving anyone.

Then the 10 weeks ended. Suddenly I could feel the pull of my monster coming at me. It’s ultimately why I decided to sign up for the 1 year challenge. I need someone looking over my shoulder, because my monster comes out when no one is looking.

The first two weeks as a FIT member I fought against the pull and was doing OK, but then a couple weeks ago my husband had to travel for work. It was only an overnight trip, but that’s all it took. The pull was too strong. I used the excuse that I had been so good for 12 weeks, surely one binge wouldn’t hurt me. So I ate. And I felt like crap.

Despite this, I did not gain any weight. In fact, I still lost weight that week. Sounds good right? Wrong. To a binger that gives off justification that it’s OK to do it again.

I finished my third novel while my husband was on his trip. I didn’t have any time to recover from my first surrender to fight off my second trigger—stress. I sent my novel out to a few beta readers and the stress of wondering what they thought kept the binge monster alive and hungry for more. I didn’t go full binge, but I slacked on non-Fun Days. I tried to tell myself that I’d just make my Fun Day Thursday rather than Saturday. But Saturday rolled around and I jumped right back on the Fun Day wagon, my monster cheering me on the entire time.

Then this past week I got sick. When I’m sick I’m just the opposite of my binge monster self—I don’t like to eat. I just wanted cereal and a Frosty. My daughter was also sick and asked for a Frosty on the way home from gymnastics. I was on a roll with not following my plan so yep, I had one too. And then again later in the week. I wasn’t eating my six meals, and I basically just let everything from a nutrition standpoint go.

The end result of the past two weeks was an emotional battlefield of F-bombs. There was a part of me that was screaming, “You can control this! You don’t want to eat it, so just put it down. Throw it away! Use your willpower, woman!”

But that’s the thing—once I surrender to the temptation of the monster I can’t control it because I no longer have the control. The monster does, and he doesn’t let go until he’s fat and satisfied. Then he lights the fuse to my F-bombs and sits back with a sinister smile. The F-bombs do exactly what the monster wants—they make me want to go farther in the other direction. They knock me down and make me feel like all my progress has been blown to bits.

So I’m replacing the F-bomb with a new word:

Setback

If I can look at these past two weeks as just a setback rather than a failure, I can remain on the right track.

I also realized that I have to let my monster out. Holding it in, keeping it a secret, just allows it to fester and threaten to infect all my progress. I now know that it’s a disease, an addiction. Unfortunately, food addiction is probably one of the hardest to conquer. I can’t stay away from food. I can’t remove myself from the thing that plagues me. Every day, all day, there is temptation from the food in the kitchen to the commercials on the television. But this is the life challenge I’ve been given, so I have to find a way to overcome it.

I will never fully be rid of my monster, but at least now he’s outside. There will be days when only a padlock will be needed to keep him out. Then there will be days when it’ll take a padlock, a three-tier bolt system, a crossbar, a nail gun, and every piece of furniture in the house to keep him from breaking down the door.

And still.

I’m not perfect. I’m not completely healed. I may have a setback every time my husband travels. I may have a setback with each new book that I launch.

But I’m no longer going to blow myself up with F-bombs. And I’m no longer going to hide my monster.